Why do the same goals continue to elude us?
As most of you know, I am rolling out this transformational program called Goalathon 2020. It is the largest, single initiative that I have designed and implemented at Learning Essence in over 14 years. And in many ways, it represents the culmination of years of experience and learning as a coach.
As the name suggests, a large part of Goalathon is learning how to shape goals that suit our life design. Just as each of us have a totally unique life path, our goals also need to be equally unique. And yet, year after year, we set “generic goals”. Less device time, getting fitter, eating better, growing my business, spending more time with loved ones…the list has to look familiar to you!
Those of us who have had training, learn how to ensure that we make our goals more specific, make ourselves more accountable and incorporate many productivity tools for goal achievement. And yet…it seems that to all of us, some goals continue to elude us. These are the ones that roll over each December, these are the ones you see pop up in old diaries and notebooks that you glance through years later and these are the ones that create doubt, anxiety and incompleteness.
I know this story well because I have had “lose x kgs” on my goal set for decades. And only recently did I have the epiphany that this goal eludes me because it carries no visible win for me. Let me explain…when I am x kgs lighter (and I have been several time), nothing significant changes in my life. Not one thing. I still have the same friendships, love, accomplishment, money, feeling of joy. In fact, in the absence of messaging that I receive from media about the appropriate weight for females in our society, I would not even think about it much.
Now let me tell you what does carry “meaning”? When my knees hurt, when I cannot do 5 favorite yoga poses, when I cannot go hiking with my partner and when I feel tired at 11 am. So, when I reshape my goal: I want to trek Everest Base Camp in 2021 without…well killing myself…this has meaning! And what I need to do to get it over the line will also include weight loss I know. The shift however is life transforming.
I now know that goals get achieved with commitment and work of course…and yet easily and routinely when they have an obvious win in it for me. And that has shifted how I look at goals completely. When I see a goal rolling over its decided completion date, I know to audit it. Does the goal fit my life? Either it does or it goes…wow! I feel light even writing that last line.
Would you give this a try in your life? And send me your feedback. I want to know how it goes for you.
Feel free to reach out to me on kashmody@learningessence.co.in, or even better, follow Learning Essence on Facebook, Instagram, Linkedin & Youtube.
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